I'm still on an emotional roller coaster, but I could see the lights at the end of the tunnel. I hope I can see the way out soon. I miss having only me and myself. He still the perfect and the right one in my opinion though. How many people has his loyalty and his love of art deco interior design? If only, there's a bit of love in his heart. I miss him.. really... It's so hard not to sleep thinking about him. Even masturbating is such a chore, trying to distract myself by watching porn or thinking dirty about someone else and I can't do that. I have developed my sense of loyalty towards him. It's just amazing what he can do on myself.
I have work tomorrow, I'm still contemplating if I should cancel my work and go to a party. My voice is like someone having a nose blocked at the moment.. It's like I'm sick, so it's a perfect time to call and cancel my shift. On the other hand, it seems that they are short of staff for tomorrow.
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